yawn.

just realised that today marks the 3rd month since I've written the previous post...

i'm tired and somehow my thots don't seem to verbalise into words anymore...

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Exhaustion.
the harder i push myself, the more i try to stay afloat, the deeper and deeper i feel that i am sinking...

I doubt i haf the strength to move on. Why is it that some ppl have all the strength, mentally and physially to take them through their daily lives and all their trials...

No matter wad i say, or how much i whine, i still haf to pick myself up and drag myself along...

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Judgmental.
i hate the way ppl look at me. i hate it whn ppl impose their views upon me. i hate it whn i lose control of myself. i hate it whn my life seems like mine no more.

who are these ppl to judge me according to their perception? if i judge them according to mine, i think they would have failed totally. yet, i always try to find the good things about these ppl and tell myself that they are nice and i attempt to put myself in their shoes to do my best in understanding why they did or said certain things.

yet, time and again, i was slapped in the face... not once, not twice... numerous.


exhausted. unappreciated. defeated. exasperated.